listen i am a 20 year old with an active libido and i’ve been home for 4 months you can chill bc i certainly won’t
”she’s just experimenting” ”it’s a phase” ”she’s confused” ”can I watch?” ”can I join?” ”you’re a lesbian? that’s hot” *continues to hit on you* ”you’re bi? wanna threesome?” ”lesbian sex doesn’t count” ”girls only do it for boys attention” ”she just needs to find the right man” ”I can change your mind” ”if you use dildos that means you really just want dick”
-people who clap when the plane lands
I wish Black Widow was sung by Nicki and Rihanna instead of their knockoffs.
when i die, cremate me and put my ashes into the pepper shakers at my favorite restaurant
what the fuck
(it’s red lobster)